I had just returned home from Los Angeles and was jet-lagged and hungry.
There was nothing to eat at home, so I decided to go out and find an all-night shop.
Once outside, I realized I had forgotten to get dressed and was wearing only underwear, but seeing how it was the middle of the night, I didn't think it would catch anyone's attention.
As I was nearing the minimart, there was a short, hairy, middle-eastern-looking man walking into a kebab shop completely naked carrying a small child, so I figured if he wasn't causing a scene in his state, no one would mind that I was in my underwear.
I walked into the minimart unsure of what I wanted to eat, so I walked into the back of the shop where they sold fresh baked goods and delicatessen items.
Thinking I wanted some fresh Turkish bread and cheese, I quickly lost my appetite and decided to buy a single Turkish flat bread that I would take home and warm up in the oven then smear some butter and honey on.
I took the bread to the counter and was attended to by a young blonde-haired man I was surprised to find working in an ethnic supermarket.
He greeted me and took the bread and asked what I was going to do with it, then he began intricately cutting it up into perfect circles that he said would fit nicely into the toaster.
He asked me if I needed anything else and went to another counter to get a bag.
As he was detained by another customer looking for cooking oil, I started watching Moneyball on my smartphone.
When the young man returned, he apologized and handed me the bag, to which he had added a French-style baguette and some donuts and told me the whole order was free of charge as I had to wait so long.
He asked me who the actor was in the film I was watching, saying he thought he looked familiar.
Not wanting me to reveal the name of the actor, he asked me to give him some clues.
I told him the actor was once married to two famous actresses but he still couldn't guess who it was and asked me to tell him the actor's name.
When I told him it was Brad Pitt, he had a confused look on his face.
He said he had heard of him but had never seen any of his films and added that a lot of people tell him he reminds them of Brad Pitt.
To be polite, I said I could see a resemblance, but said I thought he looked more like David Spade.
Not knowing who David Spade was, I searched for a photo on my phone and showed it to the young man, who laughed in agreement with the resemblance, right down to the thin mustache and chin whiskers.
I made it back home to my Lake Shore Drive high-rise just as it began to rain.
I got upstairs and went over to my desk to plug my phone into my computer to charge and took the bag into the kitchen to prepare my snack.
The rain was now battering the windows and thunder and lightning accompanied the rain and strong winds.
Just then, I noticed what smelled like an electrical fire and I immediately ran upstairs to check on the cat.
As I was walking up the stairs, the lights went out as I noticed the cat walking past me in the darkness.
I went to open the electrical closet and noticed some blue flames flickering in a hole that led to some cables.
I panicked and went to look for my phone to call the fire department but in the fray couldn't remember where I had set it down.
I ran over to my desk and saw my phone and smoke and sparks coming from the cable and I suddenly realized that the fire and subsequent blackout were caused by my phone cable and not due to the storm as I had previously thought.
The building's maintenance man, electrician and office manager all came into my apartment, the former putting out the fire with a dry chemical extinguisher while the electrician began re-writing the circuit box saying that he would have everything repaired in a matter of minutes.
I asked the office manager if she had a spare iPhone cable she could lend me and she dug one out of her purse.
I plugged my phone in and called my (Spanish) wife who had remained in Los Angeles and was staying with my aunt and uncle.
I overheard the office manager talking to someone on the phone saying that there was a tenant in her property on Lake Shore Drive and Roscoe who nearly burned the building down with a faulty phone charging cable.
I went back to see how the electrician was getting on and he gave me a snide look and I jokingly told him to be nice to me that I had just returned from a long journey and was jet-lagged, hungry and tired.
Then I woke up.
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